Chose your own adventure: Ranger’s Battle

It’s Sunday afternoon and there’s nothing to do.

The sun is shining, the birds are singing, and there’s a nice breeze wafting through the open window to your bedroom. It’s the perfect day, but you’ve decided to sulk indoors.

It’s summer and the dog days of the hazy months are starting to make you lazier than normal. After fidgeting in bed for a few minutes, you decide to check your email.

There isn’t a lot of worthwhile mail aside from a few about upcoming projects at work. Your sister has gotten a big promotion at her law firm. Good for her. There’s also a coupon for a free bowl of ramen at a newly opened shop just down the street. Sweet.

A little ways down the inbox, you see an email entitled “PLEASE LET ME OUT”.

Curiosity kills the cat and you click on the email. One piece of junk mail isn’t going to destroy your computer. A bright flash of light fills your room. You reach out to find out what’s currently burning your retinas only to be knocked over onto the floor.

The light fades and you look up to your computer.

It’s a hot, smoking mess, but on the barely-working touchscreen are three text boxes. They have a small amount of text on them and they seem to be choices. You reach out to touch one.

“Wait!” A voice suddenly calls out from behind you.

Someone from behind you grabs your shoulder and they pin you to your bed. They raise the protective visor and it reveals a young woman.

Decked out in an armour plated clad jump suit complete with a laser blaster, she looks like something out of one of your video games.

“My name is Ranger and we’re about to be invaded by the forces of evil,” she says.

She leans into the screen and frowns.

You look over to the computer and read out the three options on the screen.

“I’m part of a small group of soldiers who have been sent into your world in order to defeat the demonic forces of evil,” she says. “Earth is being invaded and you’re our only hope to save humanity.”

You’re sitting on your bed looking at the strangely dressed and strangely large woman standing in your room. Her head touches the ceiling and her long crimson hair touches the ground. She gives you a look and picks you up by the back of your shirt. She places you down onto your chair with a thud.

“So what are you going to pick?” Ranger demands. “No pressure or anything it’s not like the world is about to end BECAUSE IT IS ABOUT TO END DEPENDING ON WHAT YOU CHOICES!” She picks you up by your collar and  throttles you about. “YOUR CHOICES MATTER! THIS ISN’T SOME MORALITY SYSTEM IT’S MY MORTALITY SYSTEM WE’RE TALKING ABOUT HERE! WE NEED TO PREPARE FOR WAR!” She gently puts you down and gives you a wry smile.

“As I said, no pressure.”

Fight the Demons! | Prepare for War | Redeem your ramen coupon

— Page 1 —

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